Creepy Guy at McD's and Kids
That was an interesting late night McDonald's run yesterday. As my Mandy and I was ordering and eating our food, a middle aged male made several attempts in conversing with Mandy. Normally that by itself would be odd, but yesterday night's conversation included Mandy going into her flatmate's (my) room with a clever and committing homicide, whether criminally insane people are better than criminals, and other various equally disturbing topics. (Yea, and at the beginning of last year I was worried I might disturb HER). You'd think discussions of murder would deter others from want to approach you.
Today, a conversation with FLASH club people concluded that children's crys are at the same frequency as adult ear drums. That's why they are so irritating. This makes perfect sense evolutionarily. For children, they would receive more attention the more irritating they are. This is because you just can't ignore them. Thus the children with the more irritating cry would be more fit. Natural selection would then select for children that cries at the adult ear drum's frequency, thereby making children more and more irritating each generation.
Today, a conversation with FLASH club people concluded that children's crys are at the same frequency as adult ear drums. That's why they are so irritating. This makes perfect sense evolutionarily. For children, they would receive more attention the more irritating they are. This is because you just can't ignore them. Thus the children with the more irritating cry would be more fit. Natural selection would then select for children that cries at the adult ear drum's frequency, thereby making children more and more irritating each generation.
posted by Psychopathic Puffin at 3:26 PM
3 Comments:
Ching:
That's a perfect!
Send it to the politicians sitting in Parliamment Hill who's trying to figure out why it is that Canada's reproduction rate is dropping.
Oh and, if it makes you feel any less insane. Mere and I have a conversation on how people these days don't know how to commit suicide properly. Drinking pesticide, Drano, and other strong chemicals is really a painfully painfully slow way to self destruction. And since it’s so agonizingly slow, the probability of someone finding you while you are dieing is very high. So what ends up happening most of the time is that you are saved but your body is screwed up permanently. So life is even worse than before, and your second attempt will be more difficult than the first because people will be babysitting you all the time. Cutting your wrist ain’t a bad idea if you know which arteries and veins you must destroy…that requires a medical degree of somesort, which most of us lack. Next, jumping off a bridge doesn’t really do it most of the time because you have to land on the right angle to die. They really should put up a sign on the bridge that has the stats of attempted suicides; I’m sure that will discourage some. Gun shot to the head has a pretty good success rate compared to the other methods…only if you manage to blast your cerebellum and the medulla to bits so that life maintaining body functions, such as the pumping of the heart and breathing will stop. Take some lessons on how to fire a gun first would help. Lastly, taking entire bottles of drugs is not a good way to go because drug metabolism varies among individuals. For most of us, our liver is pretty good at handling the crap we ingest so most likely, we will not die, but suffer permanent damage to our detoxifying organs, especially the liver. For heavy drinkers, drugs is a really stupid way to go because their liver is very well trained to take toxic substances.
Really? I always thought it would be easy for you to suicide. Well, here's my tips for people wanting to suicide. If you want to jump off a building or a bridge, at least make sure it's a tall one. If you want to cut your wrist, be sure to cut toward you, as oppose to cutting accross. If you want to use a pistol, be sure to put the barrow in your mouth. If you want drugs, be sure it's tranquilizers (and drink some ethanol to compound the effect).
The trick is not making sure you kill yourself, but rather, coming up with unique and hillarious methods. I mean, if you want to die, you might as well as leave a legacy for people to remember you by. At least that's what I think.
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